Olympic skiers to have crotches microchipped

As explained in a report in The Sun:

In the age-old question of whether size truly matters, various sources will give you different answers.

However, if you happen to be a Winter Olympic skier, then yes, size DOES matter.

It matters so much in fact, that Olympians competing at this month’s Milan Cortina Games will have their crotches microchipped in an effort to crackdown on cheating.

The sport of skiing has been swept by a sensational scandal ahead of the games which claims athletes have injected hyaluronic acid into their manhoods and were stuffing clay into their underwear.

The method behind the madness relates to gaining a competitive advantage during the jump whereby they have to wear a larger suit.

This larger suit increases their lift and reduces their descent rate due to a bigger wingspan, effectively turning them into human gliders.

One study in Frontiers found even an extra 2cm in suit size circumference could reduce drag by four per cent and lift by five per cent, equivalent to an extra 5.6 metres in jump length.

With margins so tight in elite sport, that can make all the difference when it comes to bidding for a medal.

Team Norway were found at the heart of this scandal at last year’s world championships when their top two skiers were found to have manipulated the crotch area of their uniforms.

If Jurassic Park had reliable wi-fi…

That’s the setup for a new spot for Xfinity that brings back some of the key cast of the 1993 movie along with a more pleasant outcome and some cleverly reimagined dialogue.

Link to video

The Guardian corrects its ‘Melania’ rating… to zero stars

It’s one of those rare, unicorn films that doesn’t have a single redeeming quality.

By any standard,The Guardian’s review of the documentary was scathing.  That fact has now been overshadowed by this clarification:

The star rating for this film was corrected on 2 February 2026. A formatting issue led an earlier version to be awarded one star, when the reviewer’s intention was zero.

Calls to Balls

Australia’s largest IVF provider has a new campaign that literally calls out for more sperm donors.  To quote one of the creatives behind it:

The situation is dire. This isn’t a time for Aussie men to sit back, we need them to lean in and lend a hand. To get the numbers back up to where they need to be, we need people w@#king around the clock. If you’re male and aged 21-46, please think about rolling your sleeves up and doing something important for Australia.

Link to video

Seriously annoying, seriously trustworthy

In a new campaign, Allianz France wants you to know that its agents can be obsessively serious about insurance and while that may not enhance their social appeal, it’s an asset in their profession.

Link to video

Will Shat

I’ll let this Adweek report explain:

In Raisin Bran’s Super Bowl 60 ad, Will Shat happens.

More specifically, the cereal brand, which revealed its Big Game ad today, confirmed that William Shatner’s recent paparazzi sightings were not a coincidence, but in fact the opening act of a carefully staged Big Game rollout.

In the spot, the 94-year-old actor stars in a role he was born to play: Will Shat, a Star Trek knockoff with a penchant for the scatological, whose shortened surname is an unsubtle reference to the effects of fiber.

Lest the connection go unnoticed, Raisin Bran peppers the spot with digestive double entendres, including the prominent placement of a shih tzu and a tailgate scene that prompts an onlooker to remark, “Will Shat on a car!”

Link to video

Man arrested after ‘sexual performance’ with vacuum cleaner

To quote from a police report out of Florida:

On January 22, 2026, Deputies from the Osceola County Sheriff's Office responded to Grassendale Street, in the Windsor Hills Resort, Kissimmee, Fl. for reports of a man exposing his sexual organs in front of a residence. The victims that observed this behavior provided a statement and a cell phone recording of a male, partially clothed, in front of a residence, engaged in a sexual performance with a vacuum cleaner.

To quote from the coverage of the news on Boing Boing:

The make and model of the appliance were not disclosed in news reports. Options would likely center on portable models with traditional circular hoses, such as cordless wet/dry shop models from Ryobi, Milwaukee and DeWalt; home models tend to have crevice tools, wands or other attachments not obviously compatible with human genitalia. That said, the nature of the sexual performance was not specified, either, leaving open more exotic possibilities.

Ketchup in a keg

Ahead of the ‘Big Game’, Heinz has transformed a teaser thought into a 114 oz solution to serve ketchup.

Link to video

‘Sweet Sandwich Time’

Hellmann’s latest campaign has actor-comedian Andy Samberg bring to life a sandwich lover’s version of ‘Sweet Caroline’ in a high energy performance as ‘Meal’ Diamond.

Link to video

Pasta approved by ‘Italians’

Pizza Hut Middle East has a cheeky new campaign that playfully questions the notion of authenticity in Italian cuisine.  To quote from the press release:

Pizza Hut has just launched pasta. Yes, the same Pizza Hut that Italy frowns upon has now taken on another Italian classic. The kind that's creamy, cheesy, loaded with sauce, and blatantly breaks every Italian rule in the book. So, before unveiling their new pasta, they dared to challenge an entire nation, defy centuries of tradition, and actually get approval for it. By Italians. Kind of.

Link to video

Finland’s invite to Pamela Anderson

Strictly speaking, the invitation is from the city of Helsinki, and it’s a great piece of opportunistic marketing.  It was triggered by something she said in an interview to Vogue Scandinavia, about taking on her original surname- Hyytiäinen.  Fronting the invite on behalf of the city is actor Janne Hyytiäinen, presented as “currently the world's most famous Hyytiäinen”.

Link to video

IKEA’s ‘Affordable Masterpieces’

It’s a new campaign launched across Saudi Arabia and Bahrain that makes the case for the brand’s offerings being wallet-friendly objets d’art.

Links to videos:

   -Pinntorp
   -Billy
   -Hildegun
   -Strandmon
   -Ullerslev

Crocs LEGO Brick Clog

To quote from the product page on the Crocs website:

Everything you’ve ever dreamed of building begins in the LEGO® Brick Clog. Introducing a new and imaginative silhouette constructed with the best pieces of Crocs’ playfulness and The LEGO Group’s boundless creativity inspiring you to build, rebuild, and reinvent what makes you you. Each oversized pair features four studs stamped with the LEGO logo, a pivotable heel strap for a more secure fit, and a faux anti-stud sole. Accompanying this unique collector LEGO Brick Clog is a LEGO Minifigure with four pairs of their own LEGO Brick Clogs. Think of them as your partner for anywhere your creativity takes you.

Link to video featuring rapper Tommy Cash

Bic pen… reimagined as a lamp

To quote from the pre-launch description on the Seletti product page:

BIC® Lamp reinterprets the legendary BIC® Cristal at a 12:1 scale in its three most recognizable versions-classic black, blue, and red-as a floor lamp, pendant light, or wall sconce. Made with materials chosen to evoke the original with the utmost precision, while guaranteeing optimal lighting performance, this lamp celebrates one of the most widespread and beloved objects in the world.

Snow Balls Reminder

I’ll let this LinkedIn post by Ogilvy Amsterdam explain:

After years without snow, The Netherlands built snowmen again.  And a lot of other shapes. Shapes that even made national news.    

If you have time to make this, you definitely have time to check your balls.   

Together with the Testicular Cancer Foundation, we turned a snow joke into a serious reminder.  Testicular cancer is the most common cancer in men aged 15–40.  Caught early, the cure rate is 95%.    

Check your balls.

Cops pull over car ‘chewed up by Robosaurus’

To quote from a police report out of Canada:

Creativity: 10, legality: 0. Kelowna man loses a car fixed with a garden gate latch

It’s not the first time police have stopped a vehicle held together with duct tape and wishful thinking, but using a gate latch to close your door is a level of creativity rarely seen.

A BC Highway Patrol officer has ordered an Acura removed from the road after discovering an improvised door latch alongside a series of safety issues during a traffic stop.

On January 9, 2026, at 4:00 p.m., the police officer was doing speed enforcement on Highway #3 near Christina Lake when he stopped a grey Acura clocked at 130 km/h in an 80 zone.

“It’s amazing that this particular car could go that fast without disintegrating,” says Corporal Michael McLaughlin with BC Highway Patrol. “The owner had put in some effort to hammer out the dents and spray paint the repairs, but his car was not roadworthy. It looked like it had been chewed up by Robosaurus.”

Among a long list of required repairs, the rear window was missing and had been replaced with rebar and duct tape, and the driver’s door could not stay closed and was held together by a welded latch from a garden gate.

Jim Courier delivers for Uber Eats

The former world no. 1 tennis player stars in  a pun-packed campaign in which the term ‘living up to your name’ takes on a very literal meaning.  Also making an appearance are tennis stars Todd Woodbridge and Pat Rafter.

Link to video (60 seconds)

Link to shorts

‘The most interesting man’ is back

After a gap of almost a decade, Dos Equis has brought back its ‘Most Interesting Man in the World’ campaign.  Actor Jonathan Goldsmith reprises the role that became a sort of a cultural phenomenon.  The voiceover is as witty as ever and, as before, is helmed by Will Lyman.  And, yes, there’s also the iconic closing line (with some playful variations in the teaser ads).

   -Teaser 1: Yogurt

   -Teaser 2: Ship in a bottle

   -Teaser 3: Socks

   -He’s back

Melodrama is in the air

From the Philippines: the country’s flag carrier has a new 6 minute in-flight safety video that is inspired by the emotional narrative of local telenovelas. 

Link to video

Heinz makes dipping your fries easier

Around four months ago, Heinz noted the remarkable similarity between the shape of fry boxes across the world and the ketchup brand’s keyhole logo.  This week, once again, Heinz has drawn attention to fry boxes with an initiative that makes a compelling case for their redesign.

Link to video